True Friends Stab You In The Front
by highsteptohell
Summary: "You are being watched." 13 Reasons Why AU involving many wrestlers and an OC. If you read, drop a review ta. R&R is always appreciated. [FINISHED STORY.]
1. Seth Rollins

**Authors Note** : This was an idea I've had for a little while. I'm not too sure of how I am on the idea of this being wrote as like... a blog post kind of thing? I'm gonna leave it down to people that read it. But hey, my returns to WWE fan fiction. The mentions of UK wrestling are fully centered on local wrestling shows that happen around me.

Developmental was a hard process. I trained for years in the UK, but coming to America and seeing how different things were - yikes. It was a culture shock. I went from doing what people would consider extreme in training to relearning how to fall. It was so different that I was just out of it for months. I met some really great people. That's where you come in. Colby... Seth. Whatever you wanna go by. Hell, if this gets out, I'm sure people are gonna take great delight in knowing just who I'm talking about. How that perfect image you have to the fans is nothing but a disguise. You're so nice, aren't you? So sweet. Yeah, I fell for that just like a lot of other people.

Anyway, let's start at the beginning of all of this bullshit.

It was the day before I went up from developmental. The coach (Fuck it if I can remember his name. _Guy gave me the creeps._ ) had made comments about how superstars were coming to visit, and I was ecstatic. I remember wondering if Jeff and Matt would come up. They'd just returned, and being from North Carolina? I needed the words of wisdom from them. Best friends, best friends when I needed them. That's for another post, though. You don't need to worry about them. Anyway, Seth – you showed up with that strange poise about you. And I just needed to know more. I needed to make sure that you know who I was. I put on the best shows I could on that day. Some blonde chick complained about how I'd hurt her ribs, but it didn't matter. I was going up to WWE, and she wasn't. The end of the day, and you'd mentioned training with me. Strange, I didn't think I'd made that much of an impression. We trained together for a week.

It really only took me a week to fully fall in love with you.

Your laugh was contagious. The strange competitions on the Xbox. It was enough to keep me hooked. Most people would've blown it off. It was a rookie with a crush on a competitor, but - you liked me, didn't you? I remember a meeting with Stephanie. We were talking about how they were going to introduce me. A remake of Team Extreme and I was getting to do what hadn't been done in the division for a while. My phone was constantly going off. It was you.

 _[ text ]: done yet?_  
 _[ text ]: there's a nice little creak not too far_  
 _[ text ]: think you can get there if i text you directions?_

Steph had left to get some paper work, and I saw my opportunity.

 _[ text ]: Colby please._  
 _[ text ]: I can get there fast enough._

And I did. It only took me 15 minutes of agonised driving to find the small place you'd been talking about. I remember having dreams about a kiss like this. We were just enjoying talking, and it happened. There was nothing special, nothing really screaming intimate about the moment between us. When you leant in and kissed me, though? It was like my whole life had turned upside down. I know what you're thinking. " Didn't the slut suck his dick? " I mean, I am a slut, right? Yikes, I can't write that anymore, can I? The stories that you heard weren't what really happened. We kissed, and both went about our day. It was how I envisioned the moment. It being normal.

But the next day, when I walked through the halls to meet Matt and Jeff before we went out – people laughing at me dragged me out of the strange stupor I was in. Why were they laughing? What the hell had happened for them to be laughing at me? None of them really know who I was, Colby. None of them and you made a name for me before I could make it myself.

I remember Sasha coming over to me "What's this that you fucked Colby?" What? Do you remember spreading that around? That I'd pulled a Paige and made sure you remembered who I was? Bullshit. Really fucking bullshit. I didn't bother talking, just quickly scuttled my way to where my tag partners were waiting. Even they looked at me like I was a whore. That's all I really was to you, wasn't it? Someone you could use and then move onto the next. ( _I want your answer tweeted. Fans might not get it, but everyone after you will. Consider it.. My dying wish._ )

It really hurt. That was the first day that I genuinely felt I had no-one, but I had to power through it. I had to make sure that no-one know the twisted way that the locker room was already talking about me. I put on a show. I really did. Getting in the ring against men a lot bigger than me was just to spite you, Colby. I wanted to show you that I wasn't affected.

But I was. _Really_ fucking affected.

And that's it. You ruined my life in a few simple words

 _"She let me fuck her like the whore she is."_

Oh, by the way – I should probably make sure you know. It's Gemma. You know, the Diva that ended up hanging herself? Yeah, her. Words written with incredible anger by a dead girl.

If you're reading this, _you're on this blog._ You're one of the reasons why something that should've been a dream for me... ended up a nightmare. Let it be known, you're to pass the link onto the next person on this list. If you don't, I will have someone release this to the public. Let the whole world know what lies and facades the WWE keep up to make sure their pretty boys and wonderful women's division are left untouched

 _You are being watched._

That person in the bus? The caterer? They could be the ones ready to ruin your life.

In the same way you did mine.

 _But hey, lets talk about the next post. Come on down, Matt Hardy. You're next._

 **Authors Note** : So, Recently. I have finished both the 13 Reasons Why show, and reread the book. This was something that I'd wanted to do for a while, but honestly? Seeing the show really put my foot on the pedal to get this shit done. About half way through, unless people in the reviews want to know more about Gemma sooner, I'm going to make just a general about page for her and probably shove it at the start of this.

Anyway, shall we saaaaaaaaaaayy... 5 reviews for a chapter two?


	2. Matt Hardy

**Authors Note** : Whoa, I'm glad people actually liked this idea. (I know I said 5 reviews, but honestly? I'm enjoying writing this way too much. Have a couple of chapters planned out.) I'm still kinda shocked people actually thought it was okay. But yes, chapter two. Enjoy!

True friends stab you in the front. That's probably one of my favourite lyrics, but you know that, don't you Matt? You know about the tattoo on the bottom of my arm. It was something I was happy to get. But, you didn't really know the meaning behind it. I've had a lot of people turn their backs on me. People that I considered true friends. That's the worst part, really. When someone who you thought was a good friend decides that you're not really worth the fuss anymore. But you know about that, don't you? You know what it's like to look at someone and think "I'm done with you."

But this isn't about the people that have stabbed me in the back. This is about you, Matthew Moore Hardy. This is about the bullshit you piled on top of me. It was a normal day, wasn't it? Jeff was painting my face for the show. I can't really remember what we were talking about. Probably the burrito I often had for lunch. Simple things, simple things that never really mattered. It wasn't until he looked behind me that something hit me as wrong. The looks had died, but the laughs hadn't. The quiet whisperings of "slut" only ever got worse after what you did.

It wasn't even necessarily that bad. In fact, if I think about it. You don't really deserve to be here. It was just bitter jealousy on your part. You'd mentioned the night before that Reby was supposed to be showing up, but an argument had kicked off. I don't really know. I didn't like getting involved in your personal lives. We were friends, but I didn't deserve to know the ins and outs of what went on behind closed doors. Anyway, Jeff had grabbed a sheet of paper off of someone. A gentle frown on his face was the first thing I really picked up on. "Honestly, your ass isn't even that good." It was a typical Jeff comment. You know? He tends to point out stupid shit. I couldn't get offended.

But as soon as I looked at the writing. I knew exactly who it was. Your messy ass scrawl was enough to get me pissed. It wasn't that I was bothered about having "the best ass in the WWE." It was more the fact that I wasn't being looked at for my wrestling skills at the moment. It was the stupid rumour Colby had began, and the fact that a married man was saying I had the best ass. Had you been looking? Was there something you weren't telling me? It fucking bothered me, man. It really got to me that I was being looked at in the same way that Torrie Wilson once was, and not for the hardships I went through in that ring. I remember confronting you.

You got defensive almost immediately.

That's how I could _tell_ it was you. I'd known you for long enough. I'd known the way you would get to when you were caught out. You acted like a little bitch, and it angered me. I wanted to lash out. I wanted to punch you. "I'm sorry." Did you ever mean it? Was it just something that you wanted to say to shut me up? "It was just a stupid joke." A stupid joke that had tied in so many problems. I decided to leave as soon as you'd "apologized". It wasn't even worth my time. I had to stop as some kind of store to grab some smokes.

Matt, you didn't ever think about me? Did you? You didn't think about what the repercussions of what you said were? You're a fucking fool. I don't ever think you thought about anything you said that day. That store was the moment where I realized that I was going to talk to you about what the fuck had happened. He'd came up behind me whilst I was at the counter, a hand gently resting on my hip "Don't worry. I'll buy them." It was a quick grab, painful and I could feel nails dig into my skin. "Nicest ass in the WWE here. How could I say no?"

You don't get to find out who he is yet. That'll happen soon.

I wanted to cry. I wanted to scream, and punch him. That couldn't happen. I froze up, Matt. You don't know what it's like to be treated like a piece of meat. I remember making my way back to the arena and just... not moving. I didn't speak. I didn't do much. I went straight to your locker room, and pushed my way in.

I remember **screaming**.

My fist met your face, and god – you looked hurt. But fuck it if you didn't deserve it. You were a damn asshole, Matt. You didn't know what the fuck I had to go through. You don't know what it's like at all. I had to live with that until the day I died. Scary, huh? I'm so easily able to talk about dying. "Fuck you, Matt." I screamed it as loud as I could. It had drawn attention. Sasha. Charlotte, AJ. They'd all peaked around to see things get thrown.

"I said you had a nice ass, what the fuck is wrong with that?"

 _What was right, Matt?_ We'd been so close for so long and then things go tits up when you have an argument with your wife. That wasn't fair, and I wasn't excepting it. I had to physically be pulled away from you. Remember that? Remember yelling at me to go "Fuck my way to the top"? I never heard from you after that.

The slut rumours began again. Big guy in the company opening his mouth about a female wrestler? Of course, they'd believe you. Everyone always believed you. I don't think I could ever forget that day. Even with the bullshit that the next person pulled.

Oh, hey Sasha. How's it going? You're the next one.


	3. Sasha Banks

**Authors Note** : Two in one day? Three in one day? Who knows

You know how people say girls can be really bitchy? Hell, really bitchy doesn't describe it. Girls are strange. One minute, they can be braiding your hair and talking about the guys you like, and then next? They can become the biggest bitches possible. That's exactly what you did, Sasha. You made me think I had a really good friend, and then one simple thing tore us apart. I wonder if anyone knows what it was. I know that Matt does. Shall I explain? I think people would be interested in knowing about you and a married man, huh? I mean, you're not as innocent as what everyone thinks you are.

It began in the halls. You remember that, right? The hushed whispers and gentle touches. I saw a lot of them and you never knew that. You and Matt really thought what you were doing was a good thing? That no-one would see. A lot of us were friends with Reby, Sasha. You knew that, and yet? I'm getting way too far behind myself. I shouldn't be talking about that when it's not what got us pissed at each other. You remember that list, right? That list that my ass made it's way onto. Well, guess who made worst ass? And guess who it was written by?

You were livid that your little fuck toy had chosen me over you. That the guy you were screwing around with thought someone else had a nice ass. Amazing. You swore black and white that you weren't ever going to get bitchy over the small things, and then that happened. I didn't really want to talk to you about it when you confronted me. I dodged and dived the question all the damn day. Three times you asked me, and three times I ignored. Until you cornered me in catering. It wasn't really a threatening thing. There was coffee, and I was happy to have some."You know, no-one can find out, right?" I was alright with that, but Sasha - I was so fucking sure people already knew about it.

Don't think people are stupid.

I was angry. I'll admit that. I was angry that you thought I'd do that, but I was also.. I was also pretty angry that you thought I'd go against Reby like that. She didn't deserve any of the shit you caused for her. It sucked to be known as someone that had been cheated on. I don't really know what else to say about the experience with her. You'd come at me with niceties, and I generally couldn't help but snap at you. "What? Find out you're a whore?" It wasn't me, but I was just.. angry.

You swore at me. I remember that much . I remember you clearly telling me that I had no right when I was fucking around with the people that everyone wanted to sleep with. That I'd fucked my way to where I was, and it made my blood boil. We were supposed to be friends, where did the hostility come from?

 _"_ _You have no right."  
_ _"_ _You don't get to make comments about me when you're fucking a married guy."_

And then you hit me. Point blank in the face. I felt my nose crunch. Broken, which would mean I would be out before I'd even really began. I wanted to cry. We were friends. We had been friends for a while, and here you were stabbing me in the back like other people. I had to go and tell someone. You'd stormed out, and I'd been left in the locker room with no-one to actually give a shit about me. They'd all be after you, making sure you were okay (People will probably question you after reading this. I know Colby might. You _were_ dating him after Matt, right?) I wasn't going to say to Stephanie who had fucked up my nose. I didn't want to get you in any trouble.

Even after what you'd done? I considered you a sister, and I don't do that often

She'd asked me so many questions, Sasha. How I'd done it, had it been anyone here? I didn't say anything "I just fell down the bus stairs. Right on my face." There was a few checks, and I was out. Only for a few months, but it was out. I wasn't really too sure how to feel about it, but I had some kind of company. Jeff had let me come stay with him, since he and Beth were on a break. It was nice to have someone who didn't hate me for being me

But then that party.. Oh, wait. I'll be writing about that next. **Don't worry**.

I told him everything, and then we got that dumb invite from you. Well, it was one for Jeff and of course, he wanted to invite me. I wasn't wanting to go, and I'm pretty sure both of you knew it. I had to put up with it. It had been a week, and I had to pretend that things were fine between us. There was going to be people there that knew people. People that could get this shit out.

I don't think I was _ever_ prepared for that party.

Anyway, I couldn't have been mad at you. We had to try and be happy, and I was okay with that. Honestly, there's only two other people that don't deserve to be on here. You couldn't help being jealous, no-one can. Anyway, the party. You'd began dating Seth shortly after Matt had dumped you and gone crawling back to Reby. You knew what had happened between us, and you knew just how much he'd hurt me. It didn't matter, though. You were happy. I had to be happy.

And there was alcohol.

….. **So much** alcohol.

…. And I shouldn't have been anywhere near that room.

Welcome to your second page, Seth Rollins. Let's talk about that night together.

 **Authors Note** : Right, only one. LMAO. I thought I could get two, but BOI. I am tired. Trigger warnings for the next chapter will be mentions of rape. I'll be putting a warning in the star just in case people don't read these. (I don't blame you if you don't. I babble.) ALSO, I'm trying to make a trailer for this. Which is super exciting because i haven't video edited in a while.


	4. Seth Rollins Pt 2

**Authors Note** : Rape Mentions are around in this chapter. Enjoy the end bit too. You finally get to see who's helping out with this. Review if you wish. Tbh, I'd like to know what more of you think. Another chapter will probably be tonight too.  
 **Songs for Writing:** Rebirthing  & The Last Night – Skillet (I had a couple of PM's about putting the songs that give me muse. )

* * *

That dumb party. I wish I'd said no. It just seemed way too odd to go near when I'd been arguing with people there before hand. I don't even know if any of them saw me. After all, with everything that was going on - I just kind of existed. Everybody had someone there with them, and my company? He was busy trying to play responsible adult to those that were paralytic. Seriously, what was in that alcohol? It smelt like a skunk's ass, and by the state of Sasha? It wasn't exactly as innocent as people made out. There was some dumb remix I'd heard on YouTube. Jeff's choice to try and cheer me up, but that isn't really what we're here to talk about. Is it Colby? I'm sure you'd rather talk about the good things over the bad. After all, you made me at least a little happier to talk to

"You know." I didn't want to listen to you, but found myself listening, eyes narrowed "I never wanted things to go the way they did with us. I guess I just don't really know how to deal with things." You had your reasons, you explained them to me. I won't go into detail. Even in death, I don't think I could explain what happened to you. We spoke for a little while, and things finally felt normal. Like this was how it was supposed to be in the start. I felt like I had friends. You didn't really stuck around much after that. I congratulated you and Sasha, and we went about our ways. Jeff had came back over that time. Drink in his hand, and I had to look to see if you were looking – but no. I expected it. Tongue down Sasha's throat. She was super drunk, but I don't think you were that sober either.

I don't really want to talk about why I ended up in that room yet. That'll be the next few pages. So, the person that was involved in that? Don't worry. You're safe for now.

I was drunk. It was a mixture of my pain medication and the few drinks I'd had that were getting to me. Dumb, I know – but maybe I was already at the point where I wanted to kill myself. You were in there. I knew that dumb little hum better than Sasha. I'd managed to make a dash towards the corner. Lucky really that the room you were in had an alcove. I was perfectly out of sight "I'm tired, babe." Other mumblings of how she wanted to close her eyes, and I thought you were going to do something you'd regret. To your credit, you backed off when she rolled over. I respect you for that, Colby. Not taking advantage of a girl that could barely tell left from right. That was where my respect ended. Unfortunate, really. Wanna hear the biggest thing? I was really rooting for you to do right this time, right by her. She deserved it.

I went to cover her up. I wanted to make sure that she was okay, and that people thought she hadn't passed out. It didn't really last. I'd heard him almost immediately. Jericho seemed a cool guy, but god – he was arrogant when he had alcohol in him. I never... I never really got why you were friends with him either. You were nice, albeit a little fucked up. He just seemed up his own ass because of how long he'd been in the company. It really confused the fuck out of me. The conversation was as clear as day to me. I think it was just how out there my senses where at the booze

 _"_ _What you doing, man?"  
"Sasha's asleep. Just made sure she was okay..."  
"Ahh, wanna let me have..."  
"Nah, man. I ca-"_

Remember that guy in the store? _That was him. Jericho_

He scared the shit out of me when he pushed on the door. Did you even try fighting him? You had to have had some idea of what he was gonna do to her. My mind made me think it was you. When I kind of gathered what was going on, I did everything I could to believe it was you. Her screams kind of told me it wasn't. _"Get off!"_ I froze "I don't want to." I wish I'd done something. " _Stop!_ " He raped her, Colby. His sickening grunts were all I could hear. I'm sure Sasha had passed out. Frozen and just accepted it. He was over and done with pretty quick, and I had to leave. I couldn't stay there after what I'd just seen

Yours was the first face I came in contact with. Your eyes were puffy and angry, and had you been crying? I wanted to know so bad. Did you feel the guilt for letting your "friend" do what he just did? I wanted to throw up. I really fucking did. Jeff had gone somewhere. I had to walk. I couldn't.. I felt myself finally giving in and crying, and I could've sworn you reached for my arm. It sucked that I was so angry. You could've explained things to me a lot easier, and I wouldn't have been so damn mad about it later on.

Don't worry, though. I didn't let her know. I had to live with that guilt.. _Just like you._

I wonder if you ever think about that night. Is Sasha still with you? Does she know? I really hope you told her. She needs to hear that from you. Not these. I don't even think she'd believe me. Jericho wasn't even at that party until she was drunk. Maybe it's better that way – maybe. It's good that she got to live her life without thinking about it. I hope she's doing well. I hope the guilt isn't eating _you_ alive either. You're an alright guy behind all that.. macho bravado that you have.

That wasn't the end of what happened that night, though. In fact, it was the midpoint. **The boiling point.** A vision that fucked me up beyond belief. The next thing... God, I don't even want to think about what it caused.

Welcome to your page, Charlotte.

* * *

She had been looking through the pages slowly. Gemma had given her the right things. The link, paper copies signed to send out if no-one followed them through. She had to stick with it, after all – the girl had asked her nicely. She wasn't the only one. "Someone." Bullshit, there was two of them behind it, and he was stood behind her. Glancing up to the mirror in her hotel room, Nicki gave a gentle frown. What had she gotten herself into? Being the watchful eye in all of this? It wasn't what she wanted to do, but she had to.

"Babe?" John spoke up quietly "You're doing good by her. We can do good by her."

Yeah, she only hoped that was the truth


	5. Charlotte Flair

**Authors Note:** Second chapter for today! Gonna try get two out each day.

 **Songs for Muse** : Today is my enemy – The Prodigy & True Friends – Bring me The Horizon

* * *

Oh, Charlotte. You're the sweet girl everyone loves, aren't you? So different from what everyone knows you as. You were always there for a voice of reason, a voice of peace for someone who was freaking out. The big sister that everyone really wanted when they began in the wrestling community. I always liked that about you. You were the kind of person that I wanted to be. Y'know, if I wasn't such a mess. I know you're reading this and probably saying "You could've told me. I wasn't a mind reader." I never expected you to understand what I was going through. That night, though – you could tell that something was wrong, and I was so fucking appreciative of the fact that you wanted to be there for me. I remember being outside, wondering just how long it would take me to get home, and there you were. "What's wrong? Want a ride back to the hotel?" I needed it. I was close to breaking my ankle a few moments into that walk. I was scared honestly. I don't think that really mattered, but fuck. You were nice enough to give me that

I was happy to have the conversation in the car. It was like you knew that something was wrong with me, but wasn't going to question it. It was almost like being in the locker room. Talking about shitty Netflix shows, and making things out to be over the top and ridiculous. That's how we were, and I appreciated it. Were. It's so strange using that kind of word. I don't think people really get how I'm feeling right now. Anyway, I'm getting ahead of myself. We'll talk about how I feel regarding what I did. Sometime soon. I don't fucking know. Anyway. I'm not too sure what really got me thinking about our friendship as I listened to you babbling on about your dad, and how enjoyed what you were doing. It was just nice to hear you happy. It didn't seem like that was a thing that really happened all that much. You were so in character, and I only ever saw you in character. That's right, readers of this page. I would've considered her a friend, but we were more those weird friends that met each other once in a while. Charlotte, I never would really shit on you as a person. You're good. You're kind, and I love that about you. I really do love it. It will always remind me of the way that your dad was, the way he looked at the business and embraced it. You are your father's daughter. It

But that night, you were so dumb. I remember the thud as you hit the post. I remember you being upset over thinking it was a person. I started crying fully. You remember that? You remember me telling you to call someone about it? That an accident would happen. It did. It fucking did, and that death is on your hands. Allow me to introduce you to the person she killed, people of the internet. You remember Zack Ryder, right? Nice guy. Everyone wanted a push for him, and there was sudden news that he had died? WWE tried to pass it off as an accident. That he had been drunk driving, and gotten into a scrap. The memorial was funny, wasn't it? That was exactly who Zack was, and how people should always remember him.

Yeah, Charlotte Flair killed him.

Not on purpose, but her actions lead to his death. Anyway, Charlotte – back to you. You were so angry at me, because I told you what to do. I remember being angry, being livid that you were telling me to grow up and move on. You left me on the side of the road, and told me to forget about what had happened. Everything went black after that. I don't remember much else. Well, I remember waking up in my bed with the worst hangover. A little note from Jeff on my bedside table. "Zack was in accident. At hospital. Hope you're alright. Txt if need." And I didn't check in with him. I text you. I text you so many expletives and words that I never would've used. You killed him. Your actions ended up causing him to lose his life. Seeing my friends the next day was the worst. Everyone was so somber. I hugged so many people that day to try and make them feel better, but I had to live with that guilt. You seemed like you'd moved on in a day. Trying to smile, trying to laugh – but whenever you met my gaze, you seemed like you lost all confidence you had.

Sucks doesn't it, Charlotte? When you lose the confidence that you have, it blows. When you lose the ability to make eye contact with people because of what someone knows, it really is the worst feeling anyone could go through. Guilt is one of the terrible things all of you on this list will have to listen to go through. I want you to feel what I had to go through. What I'll probably remember in the grave. (Speaking of which, have they buried me yet? Have I had my memorial episode? I'm sorry. I'm curious.) I'm sorry that the guilt, and the other shit that came along with it had to happen to you, girl. You, just like Sasha, deserve so many good things, and yet? Ah, anyway. I heard a lot of good things in the few weeks after. When the company started fixing itself, you started helping out the other person that was in that crash. He was an old guy. Ben, I think was his name. I hope he's okay. He seemed like a nice guy when he came to visit you. I don't know how you're coping. I wonder if you've forgotten about it. I hope this doesn't bring up too many memories.

Next point of conversation is going to be a fun one. Strap yourself in as I talk to you about the 3rd worst situation I've ever gone through. Stalking. It's a taboo, isn't it? Taking pictures of someone as they were getting changed, watching them as they went about their daily lives? That happened to me. Who was it? I'll give you three hints. Big, Beard, Scary. Know who it is yet? I'm sure you do if you're reading this.

* * *

Welcome, Bray Wyatt to your page & I hope you have a wonderful stay. I hope you feel just uncomfortable as I did during your little escapade


	6. Bray Wyatt

**Muse Song:** Chop Suey – System of A Down

* * *

Do you know what it's like to have eyes on you? Do you know what it's like to have your privacy took away? Someone watching you slipping on that lacy underwear that you love? Do you know what it's like to have someone watch you as you wipe yourself down after a shower? Probably not. It's an exciting feeling, I bet. A sick voyeuristic feeling that you just need more of! Let it be known, I don't blame Bray for what he did. I blame the WWE for not protecting the people that work for them from shit like this. Yes, I am blaming Vince McMahon and his family for the wandering eyes of people in their work place. Let's begin, shall we? Let's talk about the first night that I realized someone was watching me. It wasn't anything really special. I had been enjoying my day. Returning to the WWE was special for me. People were excited. I was different, people liked that. It finally felt like things were good for me. I finally felt like my hard work was actually worth something. I know you felt the same way, Bray. That people talking about you was exciting. I had come in to get changed from my match that night.

How were you feeling when you were watching me? Was it _exciting_? Did you **play** with yourself seeing my stomach? Wouldn't surprise me, you always came off as the creepy guy. I want to see how that feels. I want to make you just as uncomfortable as I am right now. I'm stood outside your hotel room, writing this out on my phone. The doors open just slightly, you're in there – and I know you are. Saw you coming in here. How was the shower? I hope it was nice and warm. Creepy, right? How I can just know what you're doing. That's why you followed me around right? To find out what I was doing. That's not really what I'm here to talk about. Let's talk about how I found out what you'd been doing properly. Long explanations aside.

That day, I had taken the time to rub the little scars and bruises close to my station in the locker room. Everyone else had left, gone back to hotel rooms – whatever. I was kind of happy to be alone. I didn't want to hear Sash going on about how fun things were with her boyfriend. I didn't want to hear Charlotte going on about the road trip she was planning. It wasn't that I wasn't happy for them. I just couldn't deal with it knowing what had happened. That was an acceptable reason, right? I should hope you reading this thinks that it's acceptable. I had spent about 20 minutes just soothing myself, and then I heard it rather quietly. The gentle snap of a camera. iPhone camera to be précised. I'd heard it before. So many damn times, but I guess I tried to always pass it off as other guys meeting people backstage. It happened. Stupid me, huh? My towel was automatically pressed back to me. I didn't want anyone seeing the stupid shit I'd done to my body

But you'd already seen it, hadn't you?

My body had always been my weakness, Bray. I was never ashamed of how I looked, but I willingly put my body on the line when I could, and all the marks made it a little worse when it came to being confident. It was a weakness that I was determined not to let you see again. The little plan I had cooking up was enough for me. I was going to head in – wait until I heard you show up, and call you out. So, that's what I did. You didn't show up that day. I was kind of surprised, really. You'd shown up every once in a while – but it wasn't always going to be that good, hm? Twitter notifications were popping up on my phone, and honestly? I really regret looking at them. What even possessed you to post them to Twitter? Were you that angry that I'd seen you? You knew that I'd seen you. I could tell by the fact that you'd just... ignored me. You hadn't come near me, and I was scared. Vince had called me in soon after. I explained. Of course I Explained, you weren't getting away with things that easily.

But I was told to just **embrace** it.

Embrace my privacy being invaded? No, Bray. I wasn't doing that. I wanted to make sure people knew what you were like. I couldn't do it, though. Y'know, Vince told me to put up and shut up. That fucking stung. How was I supposed to be happy that he'd basically turned around and said that what you were doing was something easy to look past. The worst part Bray? Your actions had basically ended up with me being told my job was on the line. That is the kind of company WWE is, internet people. They don't care about sexual harassment. Terrible. I had to confront you that day, though. I wasn't okay. I think people kind of gathered that I wasn't okay. I wasn't going to tell anyone else just what was going though my mind. I wasn't going to let you get away with it. Even if it was from me. I confronted you in the car park.

 _"_ _You're a pervert!"  
"You're fucking done for!"  
_ _"_ _How dare you!"_

Did you know that you were the point where I started thinking about the big S? People had always wondered why I was so stuck to my phone after I came at you. I started searching ways I could kill myself that weren't painful. I guess none of them really stuck to the way I wanted. Pills seemed too easy, drowning seemed too peaceful. I wanted to make an impact. It sucked that it was you, because you always seemed so damn nice. It really did bother me.

Next person, I'm going to give you some hints. She's the friendly kind of person, sob story of an eating disorder. _A real sweetheart_.

Anything yet?


	7. Alexa Bliss

**Authors Note:** How would you guys feel about a playlist to go along with this fic? Something you can listen to as things go on  
 **Muse Song:** Archangel – Kevin Sherwood  & Elena Seigman

* * *

 _Alexa Bliss._ The name sounds just as wonderful as she looks, doesn't it? I'm sure you know her, know just how innocent she comes off. The Eating Disorder thing hits home for a lot of people. You don't know the real her, though. No-one really knows the real her

Don't get me wrong, I'm proud of you for talking up about that ED, Lex. In fact, I think there needs to be more people like you around for the kids that need it. I remember on the tour after the Bray incident, hearing you talking to a young girl that was suffering the same problem. Exciting, really. That you could be a role model for people. I don't know what to say that people already know. They know the facade of you that you somehow manage to keep up. It's amazing, really. I thought it would've dropped with the heel thing, that you would keep kayfabe up, but you never did. You were all smiles and sweetness. Gag. It was the typical blonde beauty image that every one of you tried to keep up, but it was worse with you, Alexa. It was disgusting. You'd bat your eyes and have people falling at your feet. Don't get me wrong, you and Kofi were adorable for the first few days. Then it got weird.

But your attitude isn't why you're on here. In fact, it's a little worse than that. You offered to help me out so many times. Often or not, we were the kind of people to end up in hotel rooms completely drunk and laughing until the sun came up. It was some of the best times of my life. I'm thankful for them. I hope you know that, but one time? There was something that got a little under your skin. I wasn't going to question it. Especially after what had happened with Bray, but the moment you said you felt like someone was watching. I had to try and help out. So, we organised to meet up in a hotel room. You knew I was comfortable in my sexuality, you knew I was open to just about anything.

 _Was_.. Does that make you uncomfortable yet?

Does anyone know that you kissed me that day? That you were so drunk you didn't hear the snap of his camera? Or did you? I think you did hear it. That the events that happened afterwards were all planned to try and get me that reputation back – and it did. I ended up the slut of a dyke. I hate that word. I really damn do. Anyway, lets explain – shall we? The kiss itself wasn't too bad. In fact, it was nice and sweet. Do you remember me touching your face? I was trying to get you off of me so we could go and confront him – but you didn't, and I guess I just didn't care anymore. But - the next day, oh. The next day the whispers returned, and I was left wondering why – and then I caught you.

" _Oh, she forced me to kiss her. She's a queer, and it's horrible that she tried it on with me._ "

I can't describe how much that hurt me. Your vision of cute was crumbling to me. I wanted to believe that you were just trying to get me wound up, and then that picture went around – and I broke down. It wasn't really that what you did was bad. It was a terrible thing, but it wasn't horrific like certain people on these pages. You know what I mean? Anyway, there's nothing else too special to this page. You know how it would've gone. I cried, I got angry and I thought about the ways I could kill myself again. That was the end of it.

How **sad**.

We're gonna travel back to that party. We're gonna travel back to the reason I was in that room. You ready? Oh, how you should be. It's exciting

* * *

Jeff flinched, grip tightening around his laptop keyboard. 2 days since he'd gotten this dumb link off of Alexa, and he'd finally reached the reason as to why he was on here. The thoughts were still sinking in. Had he really helped someone he considered a friend ( _Maybe more._ ) kill herself? That was something he was struggling to comprehend. He'd never been a bad person, never really made any comments that weren't something she was used to. He hadn't really gotten out of the thoughts that he was in, The guilt that he had to live with – when someone knocked upon the hotel room door. Was it someone that had gotten these words of a dead girl? Had he took that long that someone had believed he hadn't passed it on? The younger Hardy didn't want to open the door. He couldn't face what was on the other side. After a few moments, the sickness in his stomach had died down. He had to open it. Shaking hands reached to the knob and turned, and when he came face to face with the company money grab, Jeff's head tilted. Why the hell was John Cena at his door? He wasn't on here. At least that was what he knew.

"Hey, Jeff." There's a faint smile on his face, and Jeff can't help but look oblivious. The lack of sleep had really been getting to him, and maybe that wasn't the smartest thing. Talking to someone when he was agitated "Can I come in?" He moved aside, moving back to the laptop as quick as he could to close it.

But a hand got in the way, and Jeff was left with a slackened jaw.

"Don't worry." John replied " - You know that person she said about? A second link? What page are you on?" Jeff looked just as confused as he felt, but frowned "Finished Alexas. On mine."

"Okay, good. I want you to read it with me."

"Why?"

"You're gonna need it."


	8. Jeff Hardy

**Authors note** : Whoops. Life got the better of me. Here you go. And yes, there'll probably be another story attached to this of responses from the other superstars involved. So, I was also SUPER dumb and deleted a bunch of chapters instead of replacing. So, 5-8 are all reuploads. WAH

 **Muse Song** : Rooftops - lostprophets

* * *

Honestly, the nerves had hit Jeff more than his return at Mania had, and to know that someone had known about this? Someone had known what he'd done to help a girl end her life. He couldn't think of anything particularly bad that he'd done – especially to her. They were friends, close enough that people would've considered them more, but yet there he was, name written on the page title. What was he supposed to know? Had he cracked a joke that she'd took the wrong way? Jeff wanted to ask, he wanted to ask why John had got involved. He'd been too busy to mix with anyone. There's a moment of clarity, a pause and Jeff looks up from the laptop he's been gripping somewhat tightly "How did you -"

"How did I get involved? I'll explain afterwards. Just... Just read it."

Well, he had to. She wanted it.

* * *

 _Romeo, Romeo_. _Where for art thou, Romeo?_ I don't know Juliet. He's probably hiding from you like a lot of other guys do. That's the thing. Guys you meet and get to know? They can turn out to be the worst kind of people. No, Jeff. You're not one of them. In fact, I thought a lot differently of you than what I did everyone else. You remember before that party? How they were pushing the both of us for good things? That it was going around on the internet that the friendship had developed more than what it was? I didn't really think that I wanted that. In fact, I saw you more as another half of me. Not in the romantic way, just someone that I couldn't do my job without. Other people saw that, other people saw that we'd connected in a way that no-one else really had.

I appreciated what you did for me.

You could always tell when I was upset. See, I thought myself lucky that I could keep really dark feelings to myself. It was a family thing. We'd go stand on rooftops and you'd just let me scream. It was really nice, and refreshing – but everything you did couldn't stop me from wandering what that last little breath of air would be like

I don't know where it really began. I think just... after everything was happening. You being there to smile, to let me stay with you. I really started seeing the good that you were doing for me. Dumb, right? A married guy wouldn't pay attention to me. You did, though. I don't get why you told me that you and Beth were on a break. I didn't see that it really mattered. I wasn't going to act on anything – Anyway, let's skip forward to the interesting thing. The thing you all want to hear about.

I was so anxious about being at that party. I didn't want to go, but knowing you wanted me there made my stomach flip. Someone actually wanted me. Showing up, I felt surprisingly good. People were actually happy to see me. Even Roman, who I'd never really spoke to came over and hugged me. Zack, _oh_. Even Zack, who was that ball of typical smiles came over and greeted me. I miss him, I hope you know that. He would've been able to talk to me about this kind of shit. You know, the suicide – the... Wait, that's for the last page. You're not knowing about that. Weezer was playing when you walked back over to me. Buddy Holly. Strange I could remember that, but not what was in my drink. It was strong, though. I can remember that. I was all smiles. Just genuinely happy about having a good night. Colby and Sasha dropped on us. Remember that? How she almost pushed me off the chair until you grabbed me? God, I couldn't have complained even if I wanted to.

I was just so _fucking_ content.

We spoke, all night. We danced, we drunk. You not so much. After all, you'd do the gentlemanly thing and offer me a ride back to my hotel ( _which by the way, clean your car._ ). I was pissed. Mullered, rats assed – whatever it's called, and you got me upstairs into the room where - Lets not think about that. I don't want to ruin talking about a happy moment. The bed was lumpy. Sasha hadn't changed her blankets, and I think I made you laugh. I don't know some dumb comment about how she made enough money and yet her blankets were fucked up. Anyway, I'm rambling – back to the point. We spent hours in that room, and then you kissed me and it was like my brain had automatically straightened itself out. My first thought, and allow me to be super fucking cliché here, was how soft your lips were. Gross, huh? How I was like a giddy school girl over my best fucking friend.

I'm joking. I really liked it. I was happy that you made the move, and that I could relax. Well, I tried. I couldn't though. I wish you'd stayed when I pushed you away. There was just so much going on in my head. Colby, Chris – Being treated like shit by everyone. That I wanted you away from me so I could think. (Who am I kidding? No I didn't. I wanted you closer than before) I wish you'd stayed. I wished you had said you'd stick by me when I told you just how fucked up I was – but you left, and I didn't hear from you again. Not outside of work. That upset me, but I guess I get it. I hope you know you didn't do anything wrong to me that night.

Let it be known, Jeff. You of all the people on here don't deserve to be here. You did nothing wrong. You were just afraid to love me when I needed you too. You were kind, smart and loving. Everything I needed to keep me alive.

Next up is a dozy, a real dozy. Ever heard of someone stealing through petty jealousy? Yeah, I'm looking at you, Roman. You're next, man.

* * *

It seemed to Jeff, that his body had just stopped working. It wasn't bad, that was good - but her words "you were afraid to love me." He was, and he could admit that now. You're not supposed to care about someone else when you know you're married. That was what he'd been raised to think. Jeff heaved a heavy sigh, wiping slightly at his eyes as he did "S'true." He was sure John didn't want to hear it – but it was probably something that he needed to get out "I was scared. I wanted her to know, and I would've told her if I knew what she was going to do." Eyes glance down to a pamphlet that Steph had given everyone "Suicide Prevention." They'd only been given out before hand after Benoit, but looking through it now? So many of the things stuck out as a sign. He could've stopped it. He could've done something

John broke the moment of silence with a clap of his hands "I was there when Nicki found her." A pause "Well, kind of. She rang me, crying down the cell about how there was blood and she wasn't breathing." He was sad; you could tell by the way his face had scrunched slightly "She looked so peaceful. Don't believe what McMahon said, by the way. She hadn't just hung herself. She'd made sure that no-one would be able to get her to the hospital for help. For once, I was glad she did – look peaceful, not kill herself. It didn't look fake. Nicki found the email after a couple of days. She was just so fucking sad, and I couldn't let her go through it by herself." That was what Jeff appreciated about his company. That he was so damn loyal to the people that he loved. Something that Jeff wished he could've been. There's a pause, and Jeff finds himself encased in his friend's arms. There's one question that he really wants answering "Are you really gonna give them out if someone doesn't pass them on?"

"It's what she wants."

Maybe its bitterness, sadness over being left – but Jeff bit down on his lip softly "You should do it anyway. Let everyone know what a shit stain of a company this place is." It wasn't a bad idea, but John wasn't going to answer. He was angry, and Cena understood it.

"Well, we'll decide soon. I'm leaving it down to Nicki."

That was a good idea. Neither of them seemed particularly okay with what had happened. Maybe she was just hiding it well. Nicki seemed good at that kind of stuff. You coped with things in different ways, and Jeff just felt like he was going to be angry for longer than what he needed to be.

There was that scratch for a joint that he hadn't had in a while, but – His thoughts were broken up by a mutter of "Are you okay?"

"I will be. Let me help you guys, okay?"


	9. Roman Reigns

Authors Note: A week late. Oops. Life is less busy now? So I'm gonna try update sooner. There's a side story to this for people asking to see how the wrestlers react. That's the Spirit is absolutely gonna be my next project. One shots dependent on each person. Four more chapters of this is hella grand.

* * *

Positivity. It was a strange thing. The WWE came off as such a positive place, and that we were to get used to each other and be friends. It was Charlotte's idea to shove those stupid bags up around arenas. Like, I was there watching her make those dumb things. She applied so much glitter to those things that there was trails everywhere whilst we were there. Even the anonymous bag dripped glitter. That anonymous bag was a good idea. They were a good idea, though. I felt super confident reading some of the things in there. "Your hair looks great." I'd cut it, Roman. I know you'd noticed it. You complimented it a couple of times. Anyway, that's not really what I want to talk about, and you know that. I don't really know where to begin, where to start with the bullshit that this was. It was such a simple little thing, but it hurt me, big dog. It really hurt me, and showed me just how petulant you really fucking were.

Oh, what's that? I'm getting **bitter**. _Fucking whine about it._

No-one gave a hell about me when I needed some help, so why should I care about you? Those bags were things that I needed. I needed to see those comments. I remember the anonymous bag being looked through and when someone read the little note I'd left in there, I almost choked. It was funny that people were paying attention to me, when they didn't even know it was me. Remember what it said? It was read in front of everyone in the food hall. I'm sure you remember it "I want to kill myself. Slowly, and make sure you all feel guilty." It took someone saying that they want to kill themselves for people to actually be a good person. The company has killers, rapists, bullies and they care about someone when it's a simple fucking comment like that.

Oh man, the conversation it started was _amazing_. I was an attention seeker. How the people that had caused me shit felt bad for me. How another Benoit would've been bad for the company. I think the best one was Paul. " _If they wanted help, they wouldn't have made it anonymous._ " Maybe he had a point, but maybe my selfish ass wanted people to think about what they were doing. Anyway, we all went and checked our bags afterwards, and I noticed that mine had gotten less in it than it usually had, and it got shorter as the week went on. Until only two were left, and I decided to try something. I wrote a letter. I wont go into detail. I'm not really a detail driven person. Funny, huh? I'm writing the details of how all of you made me kill myself – and wont tell you what was in a stupid note. It was just something to make whoever took those notes understand what I was really going through

But, I made sure that after everyone left – that I started watching, and there you walked. Straight to the bag with my name on it, and pulled the note out. My positivity, Roman. Someone talking good about me. Did you do it because of the shit you get about being Vince's lapdog? Because no-one but Colby and Jon actually give a shit about you? It's pathetic. I get what it's like to feel lonely. I really do. I get what it's like to feel as if no-one cares, but why did you have to take my happiness away? That's not fair. You knew what I was going through. You knew that I needed things like that to keep me happy. You knew, because of that note. I don't think that was really upset me. Like, now I'm sitting and writing about it. It wasn't that. I guess I did understand what it was like to have no-one there for me. I just happened to embrace it after a while. You didn't though, did you?

What really upset me, was when you walked out of that room and I saw you reading it. You didn't make any move to come and talk to me. You spent ages reading it. You spent ages making sure you took every word in, and then you threw it in the trash. You threw my feelings in the trash and that was what hurt. I wanted someone to understand. I wanted someone to realize that " _Shit, this girl is suicidal and it's our faults._ " But you didn't. You didn't bother giving a shit about someone that was at their lowest. You just moved on, and continued being the bosses favorite. I'm sorry I caused so much attention that day. I'm sorry my crying, and my screaming caught the attention of everyone. I made that whole corridor look at us, and I felt bad. You wanted attention, but you didn't want attention in the way that I gave it. Hell, even Stephanie came over and asked what had happened. I noticed you looking at me when I yelled at her. Was it guilt? Did you really feel upset that you'd brought me so low so easily?

You've gotta let me know. Oh, wait – you can't if you're reading this. _**Can you**_?

Anyway, next on our list. Next on our list is someone I don't think anyone was expecting to be on here. Everybody loves Kevin, right? He's the big softy that people love. He wasn't exactly that bad to me, but... I guess you can find out the real toxicity behind social media through the nicest of people. Don't worry. It wasn't a completely public thing, but Kevin. You brought back so many feelings that I was pushing away. So many feelings that I didn't want back in my head, especially when I was looking for every way to get away from my life.


	10. Kevin Owens

" _Even though someone appears to shrug off a sideways comment or to not be affected by a rumour, it's impossible to know everything else going on in that person's life, and how we might be adding to his or her pain. People do have an impact on the lives of others; that's undeniable._ "

* * *

I remember reading that in a book. Can't remember the name of it, but I remember reading it and thinking – not true. You can't impact someone's life from what you say. Adults just move on with their lives and forget what's been said or done, but I wasn't expecting what you did to really hurt me. The rumours had fucked with me, Kevin. You knew how much they'd been messing with me. After the positivity bag thing, I think you kind of gathered that what had been written was me, but I could never tell if you thought I was serious or if it was just a joke. I think you thought it was a joke. That was something that bothered me, probably the first of many things you did that really got me shaken, got me thinking that I could trust no-one around me.

All the little things though, they don't amount to how you really made me feel when you stole that little book from me. I'll reiterate for the people that don't know what I'm talking about. I had a book that I wrote everything down in. My feelings, my thoughts. They all went down in this little book. It was my way of venting when things got really bad. At this point, most of you know, it was only a week or so before I did the thing. I'm sure you know that, don't you Kev? You wanted to make sure that things were exciting around the place again, and it was at my expense. I never thought you'd do that to me. You come off as the big softy, that everyone really loves. I get it, you come off like that—but what was what you did? Why the hell did you do it? I remember the book going missing. I was scared, and I wanted to find it as soon as possible. Then it hit me. We'd hung out the day before. I was finally getting past everything, and I'd allowed you to go in my bag to get me something.

Stupid mistake on my part, huh? To trust someone with something that I wanted kept quiet. I went and asked you as soon as I could, and you got really weird with me. Those dumb little smiles, and things muttered to yourself. There was no other response than that. It was so weird, and I wasn't sure how to respond to it. Then I remember reading it on the group blogs we had. Quiet stuff, stuff that I liked to keep away from everyone. I remember reading "We kissed, and I loved it. What kind of idiot writes this stuff?" I'd written that. Those words had came so easily onto the page. It wasn't something that was going to effect me that easily. I'd been used to things of mine being spread around, but then it was spread. It traveled from everyone, out onto actual social media. I don't wanna think about who did it. Was that you too? You'll have to tell someone about that. I want someone to know. But the spreading of that little excerpt of my book, it started up a whole lot of questions. A lot of wondering and a lot of fear on me.

Sasha knew it was me, Kevin. She knew it was me, and she let everyone know it was me. Then the questions about who it was I kissed got spread around, and so many people had guessed right. They knew it was about Jeff, and it only got worse. I spent that much time with him, that what you'd said – what you'd showed them had ruined my life so damn quickly and easily. Jeff didn't talk to me after, Kevin. I lost my best friend because of your stupidity. I lost my best friend because you couldn't keep your nose out of something that didn't belong to you. Do you know what that's like? When someone invades your privacy in the worst kind of way? It's happened to me way too many times to count, and you helped out with that. It's not big, it's not smart and honestly, fucking honestly? I thought far better of you. I thought you were far better than what everyone else was. I didn't want to think bad of you. You'd been the happy and kind person that I wanted to be, but it was ruined. Just like my opinions of everything were ruined.

It was only getting worse at that point. I didn't feel like I had any reason to live, and now you're reading this – you know that what I wanted to happen happened. Kevin, you really pushed me away from every little bit of dwindling happiness I had letting people know my secrets. I don't wanna know how many more of them got out. I don't wanna know what my friends, what people know about me. I don't wanna know how many people know about me. All my secrets. All of them, all over the internet with nothing I could do about it. It was kind of a scary thought, but now? You're gonna know exactly what that feels like. Especially if this shit isn't passed on. That Scare you, Kevin? Do you feel the sickness in your stomach that I felt when I read my own words? I hope it does, and I hope the guilt that you feel eats you alive in the same way my own paranoia kept me constantly looking behind my back.

I gotta know just how it worked out, though. Y'know, the whole killing myself thing. I'm wondering if I bled to death before I lost all the oxygen, or the other way around. Anyway, we're at an interesting point of our little tale. A little creep that doesn't know what to do with his hands. Brian Kendrick, come on down!

Oh man, feels like I'm playing the price is right with your sanity right now.


	11. Brian Kendrick

Authors Note: 2 chapters left whoa.

Brian, you are pretty interesting. There was so much that not many people know about you. I like that. I like just how secretive you were, but how talented you were too. The main thing that I hated though, was how you were with what people deemed the popular crowd. You were the person that hung around with the Big Dogs, the people that ruled the locker rooms I get it, don't get me wrong. You wanted to make a bigger name for yourself than the first time you were around. After all, being stuck with Ashley would've done the same to me. She wasn't something to be proud of working with. You were friendly and someone that people wanted to be friends with. There was just that attitude about you in NXT that I really liked. Maybe it's why I was always trying to speak to you. Anyway, I'm going on and on about things that I shouldn't be going on about. What I want to talk about is how your popularity made your head big. Everyone's favourite Cruiserweight was an arrogant asshole, and not only that? A pervert just like a few other wrestlers in this damn company.

It started pretty simple. You asked me for my number, and honestly? I kinda guessed that it was a bad idea from the start, but I just really wanted the attention. I wanted someone to just try and show me that I was alright. How dumb. No-one was really going to give a shit about me though. I think it was just me giving up at that point. I didn't want anyone to treat me like shit anymore, so the first bit of attention. I took it. It just happened to be with the wrong kind of person. I don't wanna say that about you, but I guess it has to be said. Brian Kendrick isn't a nice person. Sucks to hear that, doesn't it? That someone finally saw past that stupid little facade of a great guy that you had, and saw your for the pig that you are. We're gonna get right to the nitty gritty of all of this, what really made me hate you. First of all, you were at that party the night that Sasha was raped. You heard all of it, and didn't make any kind of voice about it all. How fucking shitty.

But the thing that really got me, was that even though you knew what I'd seen, and don't say you didn't. I know you did. You still tried to force yourself on me. Oh, I know right? Another person that thinks the women of this company owe them something. Let me finish what I was starting, anyway. Like I said, you gave me your number and I accepted the dumb date that you asked me on. I really shouldn't have, but anyway. I decided that we'd go to like some local joint. They made really good burgers, I remember that. I took my time getting there, and got there at 5pm. It was just before the show, but we decided to skip out for the night. Steph was alright with it. We worked pretty hard, and she was cool. They switched up the women's match, and the Cruiserweight dark fight was remixed too. It was fun. I waited, though. I waited so damn long for you. Girls always sit there and say, that the longer you wait. The more you go through. I went through 3 milkshakes and a plate of fries. Honestly, shouldn't have. My diet went to shit.

20 minutes passed, and then another 10, and then I was really close to leaving. I got up and started making my way to the door, and then you walked in and I was... I don't even know what I was expecting. You should've come by yourself. Not with everyone that seemed to have something out for me. Roman, Colby - Jericho. All of them were there, and made a way to a table a little bit out the way. I wanted to ask, but you'd come over saying that you'd buy me another, and that you were sorry. I accepted it, of course. I wanted to just be a little happy for the night. We sat there, and we talked, and then I felt... I felt your hand all over my leg. I felt myself freezing. I wanted to scream, and I wanted to make sure everyone in this damn restaurant knew what you were doing. Our booth was just far enough out that no-one saw what you were doing. Your hand went further up, until it just... touched me. Touched me in the most inappropriate place. It really fucking shook me.

So, I screamed. I screamed, and pushed you off of me, and I almost cried when you came at me. You were talking about how you were gonna smash my head in, and make me pay for pushing you away. You stormed out, and all of your fucking friends followed and you just... you left me. You left me there to realize that I'd been sexually harassed again. I couldn't do much. I sat there, and I accepted it. I couldn't get out of this cycle of self hatred, and the feeling of being shamed by everyone around me. I accepted that Brian, and that was your entire fault. I know, you're probably asking me why I went there, and why I didn't tell anyone what had happened. I couldn't. I was done. I couldn't be here anymore.

Okay, two more pages. Two more interesting pages. You know I told you we were gonna get to Chris sometime soon. Well, this is the page. We're gonna shoot to another party. Another party where I just wanted to lose control. Where I wanted to be reckless and happy, and god – it was the worst decision of my life. This is for you, Chris Jericho. The man who broke my soul.


	12. Chris Jericho

**Authors Note** : Rape Trigger Warnings. It's probably gonna be a very broken up chapter as it's coming to the end of this series. Bits of Jeff, bits of others. Y'know? That's the Spirit can actually start being updated soon, yaY  
 **Song for Muse:** Best of Me – A Day to Remember

* * *

No woman _ever_ wants to say that she was raped.

It's a difficult subject. Something that's considered taboo to a lot of people. I don't blame them for thinking it; no-one enjoys thinking of someone forcing themselves onto people. That happened though, didn't it Chris? My final few days on this earth were left thinking about your disgusting hands all over me, when I was drunk. Let's start at the start of all of this, what drove me to your hotel room, and what had me completely done with the bullshit that was my life. I had been helping Sandra out that day. Moving outfits, sewing a few things for her that she needed, and honestly? It was really calming. Sandra could just tell that something wrong, but she never questioned it. She just let me go quietly about my day in a hope that it could make me happy. It did. I hope you let her know just how happy she made me with those final days. Like, I really hope she doesn't blame herself for not seeing what was wrong with me. She doesn't deserve that kind of guilt like the rest of you do.

But, she'd asked me to go and buy a bunch of fabric for her. Trinity wanted something added to one of her outfits, and it involved way more fabric than she'd expected. I wanted to do something nice, mainly just to distract myself from not having to perform than night. She'd handed me her money, a wad from her own pocket. Stingy didn't describe the McMahons right now. They were more interested in expanding the company that already earned them millions instead of giving the costume designer a few hundred to buy some stuff. She didn't complain when I did though, said it was clearly business and she didn't want to feel like she owed them something. No-one wanted to feel like they owed the McMahons anything. I know I certainly didn't. So, I left. I left but you rang me. I don't remember ever giving you my number, but you probably got it off of Colby. Wouldn't surprise me. He couldn't keep anything private. You rang me and that money ended up never coming back into my hands. I'd put it on my car, and never brought it in.

* * *

Jeff paused reading the final sentence of the paragraph. That's why Sandra hadn't been happy that following week. It was why she'd kept herself out of the way, and whenever he did see her. It looked like she'd been crying. He had to wonder if she did feel guilty. Maybe, he'd take the time to remind her that it wasn't her fault. Maybe she deserved to know the things he was reading. Jeff glanced towards John, a small frown on his face. His thoughts were back to Jericho. They had to have at least some kind of way of getting him to confess what he'd done. Jeff just couldn't think of anything, until he glanced down to his phone. It probably wasn't the best, and he could probably get caught but "What are you thinking, Jeff?"

He'd already pulled out his phone, pressing it to his ear "Hey, Chris. Wanna pop over for a bit? Got a drink here." John gave a faint smile, his head nodding and he was out of the room. Jeff gave a loud sigh. He had about 10 minutes to get his phone set up in a place that could record him. He was going to get it out of him, no matter what.

* * *

She was **so** mad when I went back and said I couldn't find the money. I offered to pay, I really fucking did. She refused, shouted at me and at that moment? All I wanted was to sink further away from everyone else and I did. I retreated back to my hotel room, and of course – you were there, bottle of booze in hand. I forgot you were across from me. I couldn't say no to the drink after the shit day that I'd had. Even if it was with you. I just had to keep as far away from you as I could and leave when I could barely see straight. It would work. - It didn't work. I drank, and I drank and everything was going blurry when you made that move on me.

Everything went a mess after that. I tried crying out as you forced yourself into me, but I couldn't. You were grunting, biting me and then.. and then I passed out. You know, I woke up to you doing your pants up and throwing my shirt at me. How many times, Chris? How many times had you used me? I couldn't do anything else but get up and walk out.

* * *

 _Knock Knock._

Jeff pressed record on the camera and pulled open the door. There he was in all his glory. Pompous asshole. He handed the drink over almost immediately, and Chris took that as an opportunity to walk in and stretch himself out on the bed. He had to give it sometime, so he struck up a conversation about the work they were supposed to be doing. An hour or so passed, an hour of laughter and Jeff decided that the time was right "So, what's this that you raped Gemma?" Chris' mouth slackened. A look of almost shock that someone had actually asked him. Jeff squared up; hands shoving into his pockets "Don't bullshit me, Chris." His hands tighten, and he goes to swing – but it's almost as if Jericho knew what was coming. His hand came up, caught the younger Hardy brother's hand and gave a swift kick to the stomach. As he was on the floor, the only thing Jeff could make out before he passed out was the final words Chris had to say before he left

"She was asking for it. If that's rape, then I've raped a lot of girls."

And he was gone, and Jeff smiled as he slipped blissful darkness.

* * *

I made it back to my room that night, and just sat in the shower. I couldn't do this anymore. _I just couldn't_. That was it. I wasn't ready to be live with the violation that happened. It wasn't me. I was just... **broken**. My soul was completely ruined. I wanted it gone, and I wanted people to know just what they did to me. Every name of the people that had ruined me ended up on this sheet of paper. The people holding the other link to this have that, and I can't wait until people find out.

This is almost over. There's one more page. One more page and then you'll see or read nothing else from me. It's almost goodbye.

* * *

Jeff woke up, the dull throbbing pain in his stomach wasn't going to go away any time soon. It had happened. He had it, and he had to get it to John. Fingers limp, bend around his phone and he's softly sighing after a few moments of waiting "John, I know what we need to do. Yeah... Yeah, I got it.. We need to let them know."


	13. Vince McMahon

Authors Note: WOOO last chapter yaS. That's the Spirit will be updated tomorrow! FinaLLY.

* * *

One last chance.

I'm giving this world one last chance. Something really funny happened when I was finishing up the last page. I was going to write my thank you's, and just head into the bathroom and do what I wanted to do, but I've decided against it. I want to go and get help. I want to try and make this life good for me again, and you're gonna come along with me. I want to go and talk to someone about the rape. In fact, I'm writing this out on my phone as I go to Vince's office. That's who this is gonna be about. Vince McMahon. If you're reading this page, then whatever he's said to me hasn't worked out, and I'm dead. I'm at the point now where life doesn't feel okay, and maybe talking to someone will help. Even if it is McMahon. He isn't the kind of person that cares, so maybe? Maybe this might be a little harder than I'm expecting.

This probably isn't going to be that long, and I'm not even sorry

I'm going to his office now. He seems quite quiet – like he knows what's going on. He's asking me why I'm here, and what's wrong with me? And I'm gonna tell him. I'm gonna tell him.

It's been half hour, and McMahon's gone to get something. Some kind of paperwork for him to attempt to put forward, but I've heard the comments before. What were you wearing? What were you drinking? Did you regret saying you would? You would've killed yourself by now if you wanted to. It seems like no-ones going to believe me. I'm gonna do it. I can't stay here. He's brought the paper work back in, and I'm up and going.

Not following... He's not following.

I guess I needed someone to tell me that I was believed, but I couldn't even get that from him. You people cared. Some of you did, but none of you cared enough to try and stop me from doing this. I'm thankful or those of you that made my life good when you could, but I'm sorry that you couldn't get this to stop.

To Colby, who broke my heart. To Bray, who broke my spirit and to Chris, who broke my soul. I hope you can live with this. To the people helping me out, thank you – and I hope you know what to do with this.

* * *

The plan had been spoken through several times. John and Nicki were going. They didn't want to be a part of the company – the same way that Jeff didn't, but he had to get the message out before he even thought about it. The walk to McMahon's office had been slow, and he had to at least keep his stomach where it was when he stepped into the door to be greeted with a "Jeffrey!" Knowing that Vince hadn't stopped her bothered him, and he wanted to speak up about it immediately, but he couldn't. Vince flicked on the TV, and the younger Hardy glanced to his comrades in this escapade. They were going to talk for a minute or so, and then begin. Jeff glanced up, a small frown on his face "I want to give you this." A small sheet of paper with the link to her blog. Vince glanced down, almost distracted by what John and Nicki were saying. Jeff spoke up, the frown shifting to a small smile "These? They're the last messages of a dead girl. I was supposed to pass them on to someone else, but I want you to read them." He looked shocked, terrified by the small sheet of paper in his hands.

Jeff shuffled "I've had this, and I was so.. scared about them." He fiddled with the edge of his sheet "You knew. I know Vince." The boss looked just as scared as he did. He tried speaking up, but Jeff raised a hand "You knew. Wanna know what I know? That she told you what had happened. She told you that Chris had raped her and maybe that she was thinking of harming herself and.." He tried speaking up again. Jeff didn't really know how to respond to the stray tears falling down his face, and that the loss of his friend had broken him in some strange way "Vince, she went back to her hotel room, grabbed every pill in the cupboard, slit her wrists and to absolutely make sure she was dead... she wrapped the curtain cord around her neck and dropped."

There was that shocked silence, one that Jeff was sure he'd heard before that night at the part. It was completely different, though. Like Vince McMahon's whole world had been shook by the news that had hit him. That Vince McMahon was scared that his lie would get out. Jeff glanced towards the screen as John glanced towards the sheets of paper that he'd printed off.

" _Oh, by the way - I should probably make sure you know. It's Gemma. You know, the Diva that ended up hanging herself."_

John's words broke Vince out of his glare. "You can't do this to me. You can't.. " Can't what? He couldn't let the whole WWE universe know what they worshipped? He was going to do that, and then WWE would be nothing to him anymore. He certainly wasn't going to stand here and let this bullshit happen anymore. Jeff stood. Fingers poised on the pages in his hand. "I can't, but they can. She gave some strict directions. G'bye Vince." He bit down gently on his lip as he made his way out. It was then really, that he made eye contact with Asuka – that was her name, right? A small smile on his face as he did "hey, I uh.. Wanna come grab a burger? Curious how NXT's treating you." The Asian gave a small nod, folding her arms across her chest "Yes... Thank you."


End file.
